Capturing beauty in such chic
Attractive amidst every area
Now I cherish her herein
Days with her I’ll spend
In this path she walks with I
Clovers line our way without logic

Endearing is her smile I see.

23rd April is the day it all started..

Emotions churned.

Emotions requited.

Unhappiness arose.

Happiness covered it all up.

Sacrifices given.

Sacrifices made worth it.

A hand to hold.

A warm feeling in the hart to cherish.

Someone to walk with.

Someone to live with.

Problems started.

Problems solved with another someone.

A special someone.

To love.

Jux wanna make a wish upon this girl..

The day to end it all will never start..

I've found the pretty face

I've found someone special to hold

I'm sure my love didn't go to waste

I've found you and your beautiful soul.

He was given a shield in the past. It was a gift of parting; a gift of rejection. Nonetheless, it was a gift for him. He didn't know what to do with such a gift and simply hung it at the hinges of his hart. That shield eventually grew dusty and a little rusty. But it had its use.. it kept people from knocking on the door or the owner from taking a step out of the door..

How long has it been..

It really has been a while since he's felt this.. this pulsing constant ache in my hart. It's been so long that this has almost become an unfamiliar feeling. Well.. almost. It took one to make a dent in the shield. He suppose even shields do have their expiry date and it's about time it has served its use. Now, it takes another to knock on the door.

Should he answer the door? Is it even worth answering..?

Things are getting so confusing. I have my issues, of this I am sure. I don't know. A part of me died and came back with a vengeance. It became a constant reminder of my short-comings. A constant reminder that prevents myself from finding something worthwhile inside me. Possibly something that would allow another person to love me for who I am.

Does everyone possess something likable, lovable in them.. I don't even feel like making that a question..

I am floating about in this sea of confusion. I am being pushed around like the little me who I am in my own great ocean of thought. Sometimes, how I long for someone to throw me a life buoy. I know all my close friends would always have a spare buoy for me and I am thankful for that. At least, I can take a short little break.. so that someday, I may be able to find my little island to call it my safe haven.

Does history really have a habit of repeating itself..? How does one even know without attempting it in the present?

I need time to sort things out. And then again, I know it isn't just time that will be enough. I am who I am.

I hate these pulsing sensations in my hart. I love these pulsing sensations in my hart.

I don't want another pretty face

I don't want just anyone to hold

I don't want my love to go to waste

I want you and your beautiful soul...

Hm, my grandfather passed away on Friday morning.. Jux received this piece of news on a sunny Sunday morning. Sighx.. wat a freakin start to a year this has been.. Still remember telling him that I'll be back to see him when I get back in June and he's gotta wait for me.. Maybe I should have gone back during the Feb break.. no use crying over split tears..

Detest myself for not feeling much grief over this event.. Been having lotsa mixed feelings these few days..

Goodbye..

I feel like possessing the power of invisiblity.. so that, at least..

..sometimes, I know exactly when I am invisible..

Hm, actually, I didn't really wanna be writing this post but sometimes, things happen which makes the {in}visible pretty visible.. I don't know if this is intentional but I hope it is {un}intentional but I don't bear any grudges at all, just feels.. a little sadx. If it's human nature, then so be it, human nature ain't perfect anyway.

If I can only be your sword in battle, then I would gladly rest in your grip. If I can only be your rifle in war, then I would gladly reside behind your trigger finger. But note this..

Swords do get blunt without sharpening and rifles do fail to function without cleaning.

Thank you{s} and Please{s} are free in this world. They don't come at a price which makes them some of best things to take advantage of in Life. I may sound superficial in this but I am no saint and jux.. only human. I'm not someone who takes note of all these cos' it's too troublesome for me to be calculative over such matters, for me, it's easier if I can simply help. I hope your definition of being friends is similar to mine.. well, I hope.

Friends 'make use' of each other...? I don't think so...

Friends stab in the front...? I agree..
Friends 'help' each other...? I agree..

The world is actually such a quiet place. There are so many things that cannot be said or touched upon lest the consequences become more unbearable than you can imagine. Words spoken can be taken back or ignored.

Try squeezing a tube of toothpaste into the sink and then try putting it all back inside again..

Sometimes.. you can hear more things without using your ears..

...shush.. shush.. shush... 非常的安静...

I had to take time off to dedicate some time to... another event in my Life. I just got off the phone with my parents and heard the news that my auntie who's currently residing in England has just passed away. Sighx.. Life and Death..

Another one of my family members gets carried away by the claws of cancer..

I never really knew her that well but during our stay-overs at her place in England, I always remembered her as a kind woman. Even though I was not close to her, but she is after all part of my family and she is a woman whom I'm sure my uncle loved very much deeply.

If cancer were ever a being.. you know what.. f*ck you!!

Often in death, people usually consider mostly about the deceased and how it is unfortunate for such a thing to happen. And again, in most cases, few really think about the ones whom the deceased died next to and has left behind. I always feel that they are the ones suffering the most and.. crying the most as well. Sighx.. my hart goes out to my uncle.. Be strong...

Dedicating my last goodbye.. you will be missed.

"I am nothing special; of this I am sure. I am a common man with common thoughts, and I've lead a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But I have loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this had always been enough."

This is such a b-e-a-utiful quote.. it really is. Maybe 'cos it resonates something in me and maybe 'cos of this I am also sure.. ^o^