Everyone has skeletons in their closet. This is statement I believe I dare to make. Be it something minute or huge, there is always a secret corner left hidden in the closet. A little corner that we would probably rather forget or never had. But usually, things stay as it is. Everyone has things they wish to keep secret; things that we detest but yet, at the same time we would want to keep it as close as possible by our side 'lest the skeletons accidentally fall out of the closet... If you ask me, it's a very cruel relationship to have.

Probably that's why I feel it's a very fortunate thing for anyone to be able to find someone to dust their skeletons about with. It's a burden that would be easier to bear knowing that at least, there's someone beside you. After all, it's not easy to fulfil such a search. One thing, skeletons are not easy to handle with. We always never know how people would react to our skeletons, would they change their perception of us? Then what...? Even so, it's even more scarier to forget about the skeletons than to clean out the closet once in a while.

I cleaned out my closet recently. I'm someone who isn't comfortable in cleaning my skeletons with others even though I may preach about it being better and easier to handle if we would bother to share it with others. Slap me if you will... I sometimes try to, but decide to lock it up 'cos it doesn't concern others anyway. Things are not always pretty right here in my side of the world but perhaps no one's world is. I have some skeletons which I choose to ignore when I was young but as I grew older, perhaps they have grown with me and become stronger too. There are skeletons with me which I probably try to ignore but yet, they walk around so near by my side; and there are past skeletons which sometimes crawl out deep within the night. And... well, it hurts sometimes. Hm, it really does.

As I've said, it's an ardous task for me to find someone to dust my skeletons with. TO all my bestest friends, best friends, comrades and pals, please don't be offended after reading this, with the feeling of distrust coming from me growing within your hart. It's not that at all, on the contrary, I'm actually someone who trusts all my friends, probably in the first place, I trust myself and the decisions my hart makes where I find my friends people whom I find worthy to join me in my crossings of Life. Friends Forever, Friends For Life!!!! While at the same time, I hope my friends feel the same way about me. I believe true friends just care who you are and not what you were.

Haha! After 2 years slogging in the army hasn't exactly made the situation better, if not, it has hardened me even more so. Sigh... but I'm out of it and hopefully out of my wall too. Since that night where I dusted my skeletons and thought about all the bothersome stuff tugging at my hartstrings, I guess I should take my first step out already.

Oh well... this is mighty hard.

Sigh...

Sigh..

Sigh.

Gee.. my hart feels kinda heavy. Just stopped watching Full Metal Alchemist, an anime series. I really enjoyed the storyline, the whole alchemy theory of equilibrium and principles of the universe boiling down to simple "=" sign. For me, the way the characters are portrayed makes them easy to relate and emphatize with. When the brother, Alphonse, almost perished due to a cheap attack, my mind flushed with lotsa thoughts - what would happen if he died? what would the older brother do now? wouldn't their whole journey be for naught? How would I feel if I lost a brother...? A little corner in my chest went ouch. With a storyline that involves so many sacrifices along the way, it's hard for me not to be saddened...

Yep, I guess I'm a sucker for well-written storylines. There's something magnetic or should I say, magical about them that brings you slowly into their imaginative world with your consciousness. I become enthralled by them and most often not, I require the other side of me to draw me out of the world. Okie, maybe it may sound a little exaggerated but that's how I enjoy such entertainment, to enter their world and see through their perspective. It's a wonderful experience but sometimes... it's not. Ahhah! Maybe that's why I'm a big fan of RPGs (Role Playing Games), no matter how cliche they may have become throughout the years, they are still a joy to engage with. =)

Catch Full Metal Alchemist if you can. You'll not regret it. This post may not interest anyone that much in it but just trust me ya. I may do a review of it when I finally finish watching it. Something in me knows I gotta. haha! =D

With regards to "The Missin' 2 Years" post, I guess it wouldn't be complete without some photos to spark off some interest in the dogs. Haha! It is also in response to the comment in that post... So here we go! It's not much but it'll be good. =P

Arrr matey, this me TREASURE here! ^^

Here boy, come here boy.. Guess his name???
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BiNgO!!! It's BOY!!! haha!

A CaRiCaRtUrE ViEw PoInT.

Notoriously lazy but cute ANO.

I'm tot I thaw a putty-cat...

One more photo and I'll bite you. Just wait there. Soon.

There you have it. As I've said, it's not much but it's something. The last two pictures look intimidating huh? Yeah, he's a handsome one and his bites really hurt. Man, look at the size of his body frame; his jaw width; the length of his teeth. Wheee... imagine them sinking into the tenderness of your flesh, with blood staining his teeth and your frail body and the never-ending attempt of ripping your parts out for his shudder. Yep, shudder at the sight of OHLSSON. Fear him...!!!

Oop, what just happened.. Haha! Guess you've entered a little of my imagination world of how OHLSSON should be like. He's one of my favourite fun dog to play with and not to mention, one of the biggest con act in dog wing. haha! Think about it. ;)

*These pictures are courtesy of my friends, Bryan and Jimmy. Wonderful pals from Narcotics Section. >.<*

Currently listening to the soundtrack now. DoC actually stands for Dirge of Cerberus and OST stands for Official SoundTrack, hm, I'm sure everybody knows that by now. Silly me. -.-"' Eh... I don't know what DoC means for 'cos I haven't played it yet. Argh! It's still in freakin' Japanese. Therefore, the closest I can get to it is through the music, I guess.

I'm pretty neutral to the tracks, it's kinda difficult to appreciate a soundtrack without understanding its origins and... I'm trying hard to simply by relating it to its respective titles and to get the feel of the music. Bumber. Haha!

Strange though, the faithful music composer of the Final Fantasy series, Nobuo Uematsu, isn't on this project this time. It's by some other Jap guy named Masashi Hamauzu. Gee... miss good old Nobuo and his tunes. I can never forget one of my favourite music piece from the opening of Final Fantasy X. That's called music. =)

Never miss hearing that. Ever. Serious.

I've not been writing or should I say, blogging for almost 2 years already. Strangely, the hype of blogging also began starting roughly around that time. Articles in the papers and magazines start to write about the intricacies of blogging. Hell, it has even evolved into a kind of monetary profit.

Okie, back on track... without blogging for 2 years (all thanks to National Service and probably other reasons which I deem unsuitable to mention now), it's time for a major catch-up. Had not been really writing which I enjoy to do in the past and present... and in the future too. Haha! I hope.

I guess I could say my army Life has been a fortunate one, in some way, even one where I was always hoping to do. What is it? Having a dog to call my own. Yeah, I'm a dog lover, those pesky little mutts whose famous characteristics are obedient and loyal. After nearly two years, the word "loyal" definitely applies to them while "obedient", uh... not so. Haha! But to me, that's where all the fun lies. To train and master them is what every dog handler should accomplish. Yup, there you have it... ahem, I was a dog handler in the army. Cool huh? haha!

Anyway, on a broader perspective, I'm actually a military policeman. Sshhh... not too loud, lest others hear, if you didn't know yet, military police is not something you would shout everywhere on the streets. This may sound a little absurd, but it's true. I mean, we catch, arrest, tried and put people in detention. Hate is seeded and enemies are formed, not in most but at least in some. I'm sure some would enjoy laying a fistful of knuckles down in the face one. But luckily, I'm not one that handles the two legged species but it's the less evolved four-legged ones that are in my department. I was hoping for a post to civilian police but... this is better than nothing. It's still as interesting. I love dogs. Oops.. did I mention that already? haha! I'm sure I didn't. =P

Basically, each handler is in charge of 1 or more dogs, depending on the manpower situation at that time. Each of us will care for its health, appearance (yes, dogs have an image to upkeep as well, we call that grooming), and of course, their performance in the tasks that they are required to do. For me, I'm in the Narcotics Detector Team. Drugs are my adversity. But a pity we never do operate on a civilian basis where I'm sure our lives would be so much more interesting where drug trafficking actually happens. Poor me only does raids on boring little army camps. This could be interesting in the past where it is a rampant problem in the army but nowadays, maybe they are getting smarter or just simply couldn't be bothered anymore. I only had some brushes with "drug-found" cases but they turned negative. Bleagh! =p How I would love to have some accomplishment, yes, with my powerful sniffer companion, I would rule the world, oh, I mean I would rule all army camps!!! Yah yah... just my dream. =)

Being in the Narcotics Department is fun as personally, I think the dogs are cuter and more fun, as compared to the Guard Dogs, all grown so big and fierce. But "fierce" to us is a tentative word, as they are seldom fierce to us if we handle them properly and watch their mood swings (yes, dogs do have mood swings too, you know.) Anyway, I have two dogs under my name, ANNY and TREASURE, a 5 year old greyish black German shepherd and 8 year old black Labrador Retriever respectively. My dogs are the silent type and not as active as the others but still to me, they are a class of their own. They are still good at what they do and cute in their own right. I always do recognize that. TREASURE is getting on her years and I guess she'll be retiring soon, could tell by her exhaustion everytime I brought her on the raids. Ah... the years do go by. The good thing is we still let dogs who have retired live on and die naturally on their own. Before I was about to leave the army, ANNY came down with a type of ear infection. Man, gotta fix that up 1st. Lucky, she recovered in time and her ear was back to normal. I could leave in peace at that.

There are so many other dogs which I favoured in our side. I could even name every single Narcotics dog but in case I bore you, I shall not. The lovable and fat spaniels; the big and furry german sheperds; the adorable labradors; the obedient golden retrievers. Yes, these dogs are all there. I had some really good times and lots of laughs with them. Feeling a slight nudge in my hart now as I'm ending this post. Oh well. Sad will be sad, as parting will alway come.

In a way, they've fulfilled my little wish in having a dog for myself. As my family don't really enjoy the companies of dogs, I can only dream of owning one or until I'm capable enough to have my own house. And this experience has sort of given me a little at what owning a dog actually feels. I can say it's a hart-warming experience and definitely a fun one at the same time. Lots of responsibility also comes into play here. Hm, that's more or less my 2 years that have been missin' and I'm back! Maybe I shall end this post with a word...

... goodbye. =')

And you get LIVE. Ain't that much closer to us than we expected? ;)

Have you tried tossing a coin into the air? Have you tried letting it tinkle on the ground instead of catching it in your hands? How seldom does the coin actually stand on its side? and... how often does it land on one of its faces?

This last two questions have set up a gamble. Care to bet with me? I'll put my life's fortune on the last question instead. GOOD and EVIL share such a close relationship with each other even though one is the complete opposite of the other. They are similar to two sides of a coin, their distance apart is so close to one another but yet, it is virually impossible for one side to cross over to another's realm. They cannot exist together but nor can they, without the other.

Just like every hero needs a villian, every light needs its shadow as well. Yet, there comes a question of whether we actually require shadows to function in our world... probably yes. The existence of GOOD lives on EVIL and vice versa. This forms an integrated core of our worldly functions. It's actually quite scary to think about the total removal of EVIL itself. Let's say in an ideal world, an utopia, where EVIL is non-existent - justice will be gone; the need for enforcement will disappear; we no longer "have to be good" 'cos everyone commits the same choice; the basis of all religion will collapse... and so on.

This is definitely not a bid to publicize or praise the existence of EVIL but rather, to show that it is an integral part of our Life. So long as Man lives and thinks for himself, EVIL will never be gone, and for a "good" cause too.

Take Adam and Eve, why did they eat the forbidden fruit? Is it a sin? Apparently, 'cos God told them not to in the first place. If so, "Why did God even place the tree there?" A test? Or simply a matter of providing a choice for Man? A choice between doing GOOD or committing EVIL. (This was thought out one of my friend, which I found to be very intriguing.)

"Sometimes, evil is necessary in our Life..."

Went for a friend's 21st birthday party at one of those Pasir Ris chalets last weekend. It's been a while since I've went to the Pasir Ris ones and yup, I find that it's one of those better chalets, probably 'cos I find the environment more happening, probably?

Being a 21st birthday party, a rather high budget was used on it. Haha! Later, found out the actual cost of everything, well, yup, rather high... But hey, it's a 21st birthday anyway, and a person is only 21 once in a lifetime. And similarly, being a 21st birthday, the price of being sabotaged or more affectionately known as sabo is also very high. haha!

As expected, the birthday cake did not end up in our stomach and the bottle of champagne did not flow down our throats as well. Actually, the champagne turned out to be a "weapon of revenge". Let's just say, the floor had its fill and we had our fill of cleaning work too. -.-"' Cakes are really oily if you would closely examine and especially the mashed up ones. Since most of the cake did not end up on the birthday boy as planned, round two began naturally. Ding ding ding! Round 2!!! Target: Birthday Boy. Desired weapon: Remains of cake from the floor. Yeah, I know it's gross, so grimace as much as you like.

Hold on, that's not all, don't stop reading yet. This is the highlight of the post. As he was cleaning up after the aftermath, the bathroom was actually barged in. Yep, you read it right. We barged right in. When you have the strength of numbers, and when the opposition number is a pathetic 1, things usually proceeded simpler and faster. Ahem, I shall leave the grimly details out. Well, I saw his underwear fly out of the room if you wanted to know. (Man, this is one of the rare times I've seen a guy being stripped all the way. The wonders of a 21st birthday...)

Before anything else can happen, all I saw was flashes of digital cameras and the end result... a 21 year old guy lying on the bed, wrapped up in a blanket. What a brutal strip it all was. I don't really understand the taking of pictures part. Fact No. 1, it's a guy. Fact No. 2, we are all guys. Fact No. 3, he was naked. Lastly, Fact No. 4, guys usually don't dig guys. Argh! Want to know what can be even more grossed in the event if it happened? Imagine the birthday boy having hard-on during the whole process =s, hah! I'll be opening the door for every straight guy in the room. =Pp

The girls were not involved in the whole incident. I think they were in the living room, in a bid to distance themselves from the horror. Haha! What a weird reaction. I bet if the roles were changed and if a girl was being stripped by girls, erm... let's just say, the living room would still be empty. Everything ended with the case of the missing underwear. Remember I mentioned the underwear flew out of the room somehow, we couldn't find it in the end. Case closed.

On a side note, I learned abit of mahjong there. I learned how to start, how to take tiles, how to throw tiles and how much money to lose each round. Just short of learning how to really win yet. Even had two freaking draw games at the start, so boring. Dang!

"Energy cannot be created nor destroyed. It can only be converted from one form to another." This quote would definitely sound familiar to anyone who has dabbled in physics before or at the very least, even in basic science. It can also be decreed as a law of nature, a system of how the world works as it quietly rotates around its giant imaginary axis everyday...

From the world of science, it is, but a scientific theory that cannot be denied. Yet, it doubles its function as the core process of Life itself. Between the scientific world and the magical world lies a deep, intertwined relationship. (Magical does not necessarily refer to magic as we know today, my impression of magic would be better known as happenings that occur in Life that do not have a logical answer or a certain formula to fully explain it. Just thought I would clear that up.. ^.^) Since nothing can be created nor destroyed, a desire for something has to stem out from something else. When a person wants something, he/she has to present something of equal value. In simpler terms, this is known as equivalent trade.

It is part of a rather cruel process in how we live. No one can gain something without sacrificing something else. Take the air that we breathe, the oxygen which we extract from it, it isn't created from thin air (no pun intended.. =P) the oxygen results as a product of a food-making process in plants, which they, in turn create it from other by-products... and the chain goes on. If we are on our way to create a graduate degree for ourselves, we would have sacrificed our time, energy, sleep... etc. To achieve something we desire, we have to sacrifice another of equal value.

Sacrifice.... is a very powerful word indeed. It is one of those few words that is capable of making us stop and think. It makes us ponder if we want to even cross that word, in doing so, we may not be able to press that rewind button so obscurely placed in a little dark corner.

Yet, such a cruel process has evolved to become a necessity. It somehow teaches us to cherish that something which we have sacrificed something for. Since we have lost something in return for it, this new something has become the equal value which we have to keep. If a world does not require sacrifices, I have a feeling the human race would be just a bunch of decadent creatures already where we can have anything in a spur of a moment. Before we desire something, we would not ask the question "why do we want it?" but a more irresponsible question of "why not just have it?"

"Is there anything that is somehow capable of bypassing this system...?" Honestly, I was stumped by this question. Wouldn't it be playing God? And we all know playing God always gets us burned, as Man was never created to play God... Is there even a small thing we can get without any sacrifice? Sigh... I'll just leave with that. My thoughts can only think this much. =P

Actually, this act of equivalent trade isn't all that bad. 'Cos in a way, it has melded so well into our lives, we don't really notice it. What we don't know, can't hurt us. Oh well, my bad.

Man... the noise is almost killing me. If that sounds a little too strong, I'll repeat, it's killing me! Argh, I can even barely hear my songs from Winamp. For all those people who enjoy the quietness of your browser now, I'm suffering from the curse of the construction work.

I don't know why, but they seem or at least hear to be extra-hardworking today, 'cos they're surprisingly contributing a massive scale to my noise pollution level today. I'm not exaggerating, they had to be situated so near to my room, right at the corner, I can even say hi to them from my window if I wanted to... hm, if I wanted to.

The stupid thing that's causing all the racket is a... I don't know what's it called... simply put, it's like a giant vibrating hammer which has been going "bam, bam, bam!!!!" into some stone column the whole morning, and now, dragging into the beautiful but hot Saturday afternoon. It feels like they are trying to carve another Statue of Liberty for S'pore or something.

My speakers are almost to the max and I can just barely make out what song is playing now... Sorrie, but I can barely even hear myself now.

For some weird reason, I was blocked out of my blog yday. I keep getting a "403 FORBIDDEN" message sprewn widely across my browser, man.. locked out of my own browser. Well, looks like things are back to normal now..

Is it just me or does movies based on DC comics always appear so dark and brooding? Batman Begins also has this sort of atmosphere present in it...

Went to catch "V for Vendetta" yesterday night with some of my friends. It's not a bad movie but a little word of caution, this movie is difficult to understand, partly due to all the political reforms, with the idea of a revolution that kinda forms the crux of the movie's plotline and the powerful use of the english language. Take for an example, how many "V" words can you think of??? Right at the 1st few scenes, you'll have the main lead, V, describe himself and his situation using "V" words in 90% of his conversation. WOW!!! O,O

In any case, I find it a worthwhile movie to catch and it happens to be one of those movies where a one time view will only allow you to catch the gist of it as there's just that much information your mind can handle and process in the movie's runtime of roughly 120min... kinda prompts you to have another go at it catch the gritty details in the whole movie. Fans of action movie should stay away from it, as unlike in the trailer, the action sequences are few and between. But when they do happen, it definitely looks cool!!! =)

Governments and its citizens... To me, they form a very unique relationship, with one unable to operate in order and efficiency without the other.. How true... so many wars being fought over this weird relationship...

A favourite quote from the movie: "It's not the people that should fear the government, but it's the government that should fear the people."

I'm still in the process of constructing this blog... Trying my hand at making it mine, hoping it would gradually give itself an icon. Sigh... but tough work, considering the limited html codes residing somewhere in my mind.

Hm, I wonder what do people usually write in their very 1st posting in their blog.. Oh well, welcome aboard, here we go~!!!